


Homestuck Epilogues - Pumpkin

by strilalonde



Category: Homestuck, Homestuck Epilogues
Genre: Abuse Mentions, Depression, Epilogue Pumpkin, Epilogues, F/F, F/M, Grief, Homestuck Epilogues - Freeform, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Other, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Pumpkin Timeline, Suicidal Thoughts, Understanding, tbd
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-27
Updated: 2019-11-02
Packaged: 2020-10-31 11:29:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,196
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20792789
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/strilalonde/pseuds/strilalonde
Summary: The third pillar of canon has been established due to the downfall of two others.Watch as the Gods of Earth C handle a plethora of struggles, come to terms with what has happened + their feelings, and overall better themselves as newfound adults.All characters belong respectively to Andrew Hussie.





	1. 1

**Author's Note:**

> I've decided I'll do a weekly update on this.  
Pray we're able to keep consistency, lol.
> 
> Refresh yourself on the prologue before beginning: 
> 
> https://www.homestuck.com/epilogues/prologue/1
> 
> Edit: Sorry for typos.

**C**andy was definitely the right choice, John thinks, as he raises his hand to bring the strawberry swirl mint to his lips. There's an unsuspecting flash of green that washes the sweet in a blur, hardly giving him sufficient time to react as the crackling sparks transmute the small treat into something larger. Additionally, there's not enough comprehension to ease a conceivable movement as his hand is weighed down by a substantial orange heaviness, dragging his whole arm down as an entire **P**umpkin tumbles onto the little platter of undercooked meat. The three pause in complete befuddlement, all sets of eyes directed to the overbred squash as each of them have their own internal narrative presenting how they feel about the sudden conversion.  
John's eyebrows furrow in particular, sapphire hues lingering over the mess before directing his gaze up to Calliope and Roxy. They seem to have a similar expression, nothing could prepare them for the spontaneous shift in product.  
  
JOHN: oh.   
  
A tentative hand, belonging to John, shifts to roll the pumpkin upright. Yes, that is most certainly a pumpkin straight out of a patch. The fortuitous appearance leaves a momentary silence before a playful snicker is heard, indicating Roxy's stoic countenance has officially broke.  
  
ROXY LMAO what in the actual fuck   
ROXY: how does tht even happen  
ROXY: was tht some first guardian energy

She quickly has a hand over her mouth, shoulders shaking slightly with laughter. Calliope joins in quickly, a clawed hand placing on Roxy's thigh in amusement. It's interesting to watch her cherubic features provide the emotion of joy, so much as so that she possibly can. It would be creepy if she weren't so cute. 

CALLIOPE: well! it seems the right decision wasn’t john’s right to choose after all!  
CALLIOPE: i do not think there's mUch more to toUch Upon other than the Universe's impulse.  
CALLIOPE: i hoped the decision making wouldn't end in good being wasted though.  
CALLIOPE: similarity akin to these poor meat segments!

An overwhelming sense of calmness floods in through John's blood stream; almost like a steady torrent of purified peace is injected directly into him. For whatever reason, may it be literal or not, it was as if someone else has taken the decisive load off his shoulders. As if the choosing before him of meat or candy was not his destiny at all. 

**P**umpkin was the correct answer.

JOHN: haha, i guess so.  
JOHN: i think i'll stay after all.  
ROXY: rlly??  
JOHN: i mean, yeah. i don't exactly know what it is.  
JOHN: i had steady qualms on both going and not going, but i actually don't think i need to do anything in terms of using my recton junk to go back at all.  
JOHN: so i guess i'm staying? but not for the same reason i would be staying if i had more time to think about it.  
JOHN: but it just feels like i'm staying with....purpose?  
JOHN: like this entire place just felt a lot more real and i should start treating it that way.  
JOHN: because let's be real, i haven't.  
JOHN: not to entirely bring that up, sorry.  
JOHN: but wha- 

The aggressive buzz coming from John's pocket promptly executes his train of thought. His eyebrows furrow again, hand shifting inside to extract his device to look at the screen. Huh, it's Rose.

JOHN: huh, it's rose.  
JOHN: hold on, sorry.

John accepts the call after a hesitant moment and presses the receiving end of the phone up to his ear. His mouth opens to speak, but Rose interjects immediately.

ROSE: You haven't left yet, have you?  
ROSE: It's imperative you don't go.  
JOHN: uh.

Roxy gives him a quizzical look, but Calliope seems fairly knowing. He directs his sight elsewhere for the moment. There's a flower not far off from where he's seated. Eyes scrutinize the delicate petals softly, even prompting a gentle breeze to watch it waver back and forth idly. 

JOHN: i haven't left yet, no. i don't think i will at all, actually.  
ROSE: I'll firmly skip the pleasantries of the guess and choose game.  
ROSE: As dull as that can be.  
ROSE: He's terminated, John.

There's another pause. Rose receives a perplexed exhale of air from his lungs and it's likely she understands the emotional indication behind it. Moments earlier she was just elaborating upon how important it was that he go back and fight Lord English and now he's supposedly gone? Everything feels so surreal, yet entirely concrete at the same time. 

JOHN: terminated???  
ROSE: Yes, terminated. Departed. Deceased.  
ROSE: Lord English is dead.  
ROSE: I couldn't comprehensively garner the entire display of his downfall, but he was sucked into the black hole.  
ROSE: I'm sure you understand how that turned out for him.  
JOHN: wait, so what does this mean?  
JOHN: what about our timeline?  
ROSE: I wouldn't worry about that right now.  
ROSE: Even I am struggling to compile everything together with this newfound information and existing data.  
ROSE: I'll talk to you about it later when I'm situated with a theorized explanation.  
ROSE: For now I need to lay down.  
JOHN: okay?   
JOHN: right, i'll talk to you soon about it.  
ROSE: Bye, John.

Rose is the first to hang up, leaving John to press the device onto his face longer than the conversation lasted. Eventually, he peels the phone from his cheek and locks the screen, eyes casting back over to Calliope and Roxy. They both convey expectancy in their expressions. 

ROXY: well???  
ROXY: r u jus gonna leave us in the dark or what   
ROXY: who is terminated   
ROXY: english??  
JOHN: yeah, i guess so. according to rose.  
JOHN: she didn't give me the full extent of what she saw but she said she'll try soon.  
JOHN: i'm honestly super confused.  
JOHN: but i'm not mad about it.   
JOHN: if he's dead without me specifically going off to assist the fight then....

His eyebrows crease together, words trailing off. It seems as if he's trying to collegiate Rose's elaborations of the three pillars and connect them into the moment. It is now, however, that John realizes he shouldn't and does not progress. He exhales an awkward laugh.

JOHN: haha, it's whatever for right now.   
JOHN: so, uh.   
JOHN: was there anything else to discuss? this entire derailment has thrown me off.  
ROXY: actually callie wa- 

Calliope cuts Roxy off with a hand on her shoulder and a verbal exchange.

CALLIOPE: oh! i ensUre it is nothing anymore!  
CALLIOPE: i think it is in oUr best interest to merely forge ahead this moment cheerfully!  
CALLIOPE: woUld yoU care for another swirl?

For the first time in a long time, John can feel the corners of his lips raise slightly and genuinely as he lingers his sight over Calliope. With a shift it's seen that Roxy wanted to inquire, but stood against it when favoring a good time over a questioning time. Despite the loitering curiousness, John himself doesn't butt into it either. 

No need to be such a clown.

Eyes direct to a green hand as Calliope holds out another piece of candy for him. He extends his arm and gently takes it, popping it into his mouth while also wondering what the mixture of meat and candy tastes like. The sweetness bursts and while it's busy infiltrating his tastebuds, he picks up a saved piece of meat and rips into it like a dog trying to rip apart a chew toy. It prompts concerned looks from the girls and a scrunched up face of contemplation from his own. 

That was a bad idea.


	2. 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lemme know about any typos!
> 
> As things get situated, the first few chapters will be pretty typical.

The harsh rays of the sunset illuminate every standing structure located in the carapace kingdom. Every tree and building casts a shadow, the sky swirls like a calming sherbet; an amalgamation of pinks, blues, oranges, and purples. Bright faces have a golden glow cast over them, heightening every little detail from the color of their eyes to every little contour and dip. Leaves scatter down now and then at a slow rate, indicating that time is at a delayed constant. Reality declares that it's a beautiful sight for the three, but also indicates that it's time for them to part for the day. John surely didn't expect to hang around this long, but he is certainly far from complaining.  
Three sets of hands assist in capping dishes and bottles, to which they also help guide items back into the cute little basket they came in. John cheats slightly with the blanket, using a gust of wind to rise it high enough to effectively fold it in a neat manner so that they can carry it back easier. 

ROXY: ill text u soon, ok???  
ROXY: happy birthday 

Pink painted lips turn up into an infectious smile, arms extending and promptly wrapping around John's form. Calliope smiles with purpose as well, slipping forward to wrap an arm around both of them. It's a group hug and it gives John an overwhelming feeling that he hasn't felt in a long time. His stomach twists, chest even tightening slightly. His expression is seemingly confused before it softens into something appreciative. There's a small smile from him, not as wide as theirs but still definable.

JOHN: thanks guys.

The hug is released and with a wave John finds himself flying all the way back over to salamander village and soon into his home. Entering in through the upper floor's window, hues take in the alarming state of his bedroom.  
The disarray is almost startling. The mass majority of the clutter consisted of clothes, both dirty and clean. It spreads over the room like a sea of miscellaneous fabric despondency, with the fish residing within being old takeout boxes and plates. There's only a minimal trail to the door that you could see the original floorboards underneath. Other randomized features are included: wires, recreational items, useless artifacts. The desk not far off from a chaotic bed is left in the same ataxia, a lot of it being similar plates, water bottles and more useless items. The keyboard is clear and the desktop and tower is turned off, something it has been for quite some time. He doesn't even remember the last time he physically typed on it, let alone powered it all on.  
He feels negligent.  
A spiral of thoughts cloud into his head, as if the sunny day has been overrun by a spontaneous thunderstorm. The grey in the sky is quick to hover over the brilliant sun and bestow a termagant storm of harsh hail and wind. A hand raises to adjust his glasses as if it would protect him from the metaphorical transformation of weather. He never took into high consideration just how bad he had let himself go. It didn't even look like the same room.  
This pushes an onslaught of questions into his head. At what point did he let this happen and at what point did he opt out for completely blinding himself to the conditions in which he lived in? This wasn't particularly normal for a grown adult, right? Part of being responsible is keeping your dwelling clean. Keeping yourself clean, prepared. Why is it just now he's acknowledging this?  
His lips purse as he floats over to his desk chair, pushing off the pile of unorganized clothes onto the floor where the rest were. He takes a seat with a huff of cool air, mind scrambling to pinpoint his lack of effort. John needs to clean his room and with all things still in consideration, he finds that there's still a strong lack of motivation. The corners of his lips tug downward, leaning back against the chair in contemplation.  
All thoughts are briefly ceased by the alert of another text. Pulling out his phone and unlocking it, it's now clear to him he's received a few texts from different people. He still hasn't cleared Rose's messages, but the most recent text was calling to his attention more than sorting through her aloof text. He taps the chat and quickly gets to work of the latest sent messages.

JADE: happy birthday!!!  
JADE: let me know if you want to do anything after you and rose talk 

That was sent during the very first phone call he had with Rose, which was probably why he never really noticed them coming in. There is, however, new messages to read.

JADE: hey so  
JADE: i heard you hung out with roxy and calliope today  
JADE: and also that lord english has finally fallen somehow??  
JADE: its like there is some weird stuff going on with the furthest ring but i have no clue how to word it?  
JADE: like the green sun is trying to rebirth  
JADE: but, anyways!!  
JADE: let me know how your time with callie and roxy were  
JOHN: wow. word still travel pretty fast. 

That was true. He wonders who had spread the information around so quickly but also entertains the fact it doesn't really matter. He was out of his home for once and he doesn't see it as an overly big deal. Or was it? 

JADE: hehe yeah!   
JADE: i just know!  
JADE: you know how it is with me   
JOHN: oh come on roxy probably told you!  
JADE: killjoy ;)  
JADE: but yeah  
JOHN: it's good to know everyone still contacts like that. 

To be perceptibly honest, that sounded much worse than what he meant it to be. It seemed like John himself barely took the horns of life to reach out on a constant basis, even when he would receive an influx of texts from his good friends. He wonders where he let that go just as well as his bedroom. Why didn't he keep in touch? He always claimed he just never felt like communicating, yet that lack of motivation seemingly built up into a corruptive mindset. The mere thought along piles up a steady tower of bricks onto his shoulders, he can almost physically feel their sharp corners digging into the flesh of his skin. 

JADE: some of us do!!!  
JADE: or try, you know how it is  
JADE: but i want to know how your picnic was!  
JADE: did you have a decent day? 

There's a pause as John's thumb hovers over the phone's display. Did he have a decent day? He saw Rose in horrid health, was tasked with making a big decision only for it to become null, and then hung out with a couple of old friends. That sounds like a semi-positive occurrence in his book. 

JOHN: yeah, i did. it's been a long time since i've just had a calm picnic with someone.  
JOHN: or at all. have i ever gone on a legitimate picnic? i can't directly say i have, i guess.  
JOHN: today has just felt better than most in general.  
JOHN: i feel....  
JOHN: sort of...  
JADE: genuine?  
JOHN: huh?

Genuine? Concrete. That pretty much marks how he feels in some way. Life, suddenly, just seems so blatantly palpable. He couldn't diagnose it factually before, but he believes now he can. 

JOHN: yeah. genuine.  
JOHN: i feel like we're canon.  
JADE: oh, jeeze! more of the reality distinction talk  
JADE: i know its something credible to consider due to the copious amounts of timelines orbiting around or whatever  
JADE: but ive always felt like we were all pretty legitimized  
JADE: regardless of what was going on in paradox space   
JADE: but this wasnt exactly what i wanted to talk about right now  
JOHN: right, you wanted to know about our picnic?  
JADE: yeah!! im glad you got out of the house for once :p  
JOHN: it was pretty nice.   
JOHN: we just caught up with each other like old friends although it was more of me catching up with them.  
JOHN: things have been uneventful.  
JADE: well   
JADE: if you stop being a total flake on me, id like to hang out soon!   
JADE: i can pull dave and karkat along too! they miss you just as much as i do  
JADE: maybe we can even have our own little picnic!  
JADE: unless those get old for you pretty fast  
JOHN: i wouldn't necessary know until we wear our the picnic having.  
JOHN: so it doesn't hurt to try and see how many we can have until it becomes less diverting.  
JOHN: but until then i think i'll give a premature rain check and get to actually messaging everyone back, haha.  
JADE: fine!! i should probably go too  
JADE: we can pick up the picnic planning tomorrow  
JADE: i will even message you so you remember  
JOHN: that sounds good with me.  
JOHN: talk to you later! 

John taps out of the chat, eyes lingering over to the few other highlighted tabs. It seems Dave had messaged him recently along with Karkat, Jake, Jane and Roxy. There are still the forty-six messages from Rose he's yet to clear, and so a thumb directs to handle just that. He skims through idly, but ultimately backtracks to thoroughly analyze. The urgency of her words are alarming, he wishes he would've woken up sooner from dreaming in anime to look at them for her. He tabs back to the menu of messages and hovers his thumb over Dave's chat with hesitancy. 


	3. 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm five days late, but it really be like that sometimes.
> 
> Obligatory lemme know if there's typos.
> 
> I've been busy and sick so it is sort of brief.

The midnight breeze that flows through the spring air ruffles some loose leaves from their respective home on a tree's branch. They flow through the air smoothly, spiraling and twisting until they find their new destination on an empty park bench. Another breeze progresses their adventure, pushing them off the bench and into the moistened grass nearby. To sum up the scenery, outside is peaceful. It's a lovely night to go on a walk, perhaps to clear one's mind of various interferences.  
There's a loud thunk as a forearm meets the smooth surface of a wall, not hard enough to disturb the finish but enough to administer a sharp sting to the person's skin. A shallow breath is present directly after, soon to be a hiss of frustration. A pair of orange eyes are hazed, blurred with what one could assume were tears, sweat even finds its way to intermix with them. A shaky hand fumbles to unlock a phone, if that grip were any tighter the poor thing would be crushed. It takes Dirk Strider a moment to locate a familiar contact. His thumb hovers over two possible candidates to call. He feels compelled to tap the first one and his thumb presses into the call button to confirm.  
But it slides down to prove the action incomplete. It's only then the second contact is chosen. 

DIRK: It's getting worse.  
DIRK: Explicitly worse. I can't do jack shit anymore, Ro Lal.  
ROXY: woah k k  
ROXY: i can tell  
ROXY: no offense but u sound like shit  
DIRK: Thanks, I try to keep this composition under lock and key.  
DIRK: But for you it's constantly unlatched.  
ROXY: why dont i shimmy over and we can get u assorted  
ROXY: ok???  
ROXY: ik its real rough but u can do this  
ROXY: hold out im omw  
DIRK: I feel like I should already have my emblematic ducks in a row.  
DIRK: All following their momma to the pond like good little spawns of Jesus.  
DIRK: But for all that's wrong in the world, it's duck hunting season.  
DIRK: These huntsmen just don't care.  
ROXY: well dis huntswoman sure asf cares  
ROXY: gonna stomp on over to them and pour sum rain on their shitty parade  
ROXY: take a dignified sip o water from my cool camo canteen and chew them tf outs  
ROXY: then guide those little duckies + momma into the pond where they belong  
ROXY: float ez lil dudes ily  
ROXY: anyways im gunna hang up  
ROXY: just take a few deep breaths ill be there asap!!! 

Roxy hangs up, the wind was interfering with their connection anyways. A heavier exhale attempts to heave his lungs, but the weight of it makes the breath even shorter. He opts for tossing the phone aside, directly to the ground, cracking the poor display of the screen in the process. He knows she'll keep her word, it was just a couple minute flight. After all this time, Roxy was always still trying to keep him together, even if the thread she used was worked so thin.  
Eyes direct to the workshop's window, squinting to take in the void the night projects. A rough hand shifts upward to wipe his eyes clear, which only smears the tears stuck to his lashes onto his skin. It frustrates him furthermore, but he reflects back to what Roxy said. Deep breaths, she's coming.  
A hand stays connected to his face, palm placed firmly against an eye as he straightens out his back. His regular seat is not too far off from where he stands, to which Dirk finds himself hobbling over and throwing himself into it. The headache that plagues his mind intensifies with the abrupt movement of his planting, causing him to physically wince. It's getting harder and harder to combat these overactive instances and as such, he's unsure as to whether or not he can truly over come the internal rumpus.  
There's a click and a sliding sound, panel against slot and fabric against metal. Roxy enters in through the window, savorily cladded in pajamas of the comfortable variation. Bare lips purse, body shifting to land effectively with feet flat on the floor. A set of pink eyes hover over the work room until they land on the exhausted figure of her friend. Her expression softens, guiding herself over to him and placing the back of her hand against his forehead. This entire thing is making him physically ill, and frankly it's getting tough to watch.

ROXY: who knew it would bamboozle u dis fuckin hard  
ROXY: cmon lets get u in bed  
ROXY: snuggle u up  
ROXY: tuck you in  
ROXY: ill sing u a lil song too dw 

A broken noise that one can only assume is a chuckle leaves Dirk, one hand shifting to grip the arm of the chair and the other shoveling fingers through his hair. Some of the sweat forces some strands to stick to his face, and as disgusting as that is for him, he can't bear to mind right now.

DIRK: Right.  
DIRK: Gonna need an arm. 

Roxy is compliant, giving a small nod and shifting herself to firmly, yet gently, grip his arm. In part of her strength and to his shifting, they both get the guy to his feet. Instinctively, Roxy's arm shifts under Dirk's arm, draping his over her shoulder. She keeps him steady, guiding him slowly out of the work area and over to the sorry excuse of a bed that he hardly ever uses.  
She reels back the blanket with her good hand, and Dirk's body falls onto the mattress with a grunt, not yet forcing his way all the way in. One hand shifts, grabbing onto her arm softly as his lungs heave again. Roxy's eyebrows furrow in concern, hand shifting to run through the front of his hair.  
It felt nice to be a good friend, but it was a pretty heavy situation to place on her shoulders. Old habits of handling her friends shit never truly died, and for now she's forwardly determined to help him through this. It's a surprise he even let her.

ROXY: ur gonna b ok  
ROXY: all this shityucky junk gonna slip thru and ur gonna be all back to normal  
ROXY: kickin ass on ur shows w j  
ROXY: and buildin shit 2 ur full standards  
DIRK: Yes, yes, I know.  
DIRK: But it's taking too long.  
DIRK: It feels as if there's a version of me out there that's trying to take over entirely.  
DIRK: It's difficult to elaborate, but I think I have a minimal concept of what's happening.  
DIRK: It's just going to get worse before it gets better too.  
DIRK: I'm still preparing for it, to the best of my capabilities at least. It's difficult to do anything right now.  
ROXY: ik  
ROXY: dats ok  
ROXY: im still gunna b here 2 help you through this  
ROXY: i cant leave onena my bffsies hangin  
DIRK: Thanks, Ro Lal.  
DIRK: There's something I can let you know, by the way.  
DIRK: An intrusive hunch.  
ROXY: wuts that??  
DIRK: Something is physically coming.  
ROXY: huh  
DIRK: Something is coming for confrontation and I'm pretty damn sure it's me. 

Roxy's eyebrows furrow, trying to garner what that explicitly means. She doesn't doubt he's telling the truth, his tone is serious and so is his expression in the way his face contorts. It admittedly makes her a bit antsy, shifting from foot to foot.

DIRK: I think I need a game plan.  
ROXY: no dstri  
DIRK: I- wait, what did you just say?  
ROXY: WE need a game plan 


	4. A/N

It's been a hot minute since I've updated, but I will soon It might be an extensive hot minute if you know what I mean.

Also Homestuck^2 is wildin'.


End file.
